Over the years, one of the most healthy relationships I have admired is the bond between the Gyan brothers. There is something deeply moving about watching Baffour Gyan beside his younger brother, Asamoah Gyan. Long before Asamoah became one of Ghana’s most recognised footballers, Baffour was already a Black Stars player and an important influence in his younger brother’s journey.
He encouraged him to choose Acra Academy rather than move farther away for school, believing that staying in Accra would increase his chances of being noticed by scouts. He later helped open doors through his own reputation and experience. Asamoah himself has said that Baffour was like a coach, a role model, his biggest critic and the person who saw greatness in him before many others did.
Along the way, something beautiful transpired; the younger brother’s star became bigger than the elder brother’s. Asamoah went on to become Ghana’s all time leading scorer, captain the Black Stars and established himself as one of the country’s football legends. Baffour, meanwhile, did not seem threatened by the fact that the person he had helped was now more celebrated than he was.
In fact, during the time I began to observe the brothers enjoy those beautiful moments, I assumed it was just for the cameras. However, after years of watching their synergy grow, and their cordial relationship deepens, it occurred to me how genuine their bond was.
What strikes me is not simply that Baffour helped Asamoah rise. It is the fact that their relationship did not appear to become a competition when the student became more famous than the teacher. I still see images and moments of the brothers together where the elder brother still celebrates, supports and even serves the younger one sometimes. That reality gets me thinking : how many of us can genuinely celebrate the person we helped when their success becomes greater than ours?
In my interactions with people, I have observed that it is easy to celebrate someone’s success when we feel superior to them. It is easier when they still need our advice, still mention our names and make it obvious that we played a role in their journey. But what happens when people begin calling them instead of us? What happens when the person we introduced to an opportunity becomes the person others are introduced to opportunities? Goodwill is not tested when we are helping others rise, but when their rising challenges our own sense of importance.
In many families, communities, churches, organisations, and workplaces, success sometimes becomes competitive. Most people only celebrate people while their achievements remain within a comfortable distance of their own. The moment someone they supported begins receiving greater recognition, insecurity sets in. I have seen these scenarios play out in churches where senior ministers who are supposed to help the younger ones rather fight them until some eventually make a shipwreck of their faiths.
Lately, I have been wondering that if we truly believe our purpose includes helping others flourish, then why should their flourishing appear like an insult to our own significance. Scripture teaches us to rejoice with those who rejoice. That sounds simple until someone else is receiving the very recognition we once desired. Then rejoicing becomes a discipline. I have trained myself to understand that another person’s increase does not automatically mean my decrease.
I have come to the realisation that the greatest reward of mentorship or supporting someone is not being the most successful person in the relationship. I believe it is the fulfilment you have knowing that something you carried has been transferred into another life and multiplied. Baffour’s story constantly reminds me that I do not lose my value because someone I helped becomes exceptional. In fact, their excellence may be evidence that the investment mattered.
In the end, when you are closer to the Sun, you don’t necessarily have to be a ‘star’ to shine. Mature goodwill, I’m convinced, is not simply helping someone get ahead. It is having enough security to let them go ahead of you while maintaining your joy and cheering them on.
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