Blinded by Love

Falling in love is intoxicating. It sweeps in like a whirlwind, gripping your heart, clouding your mind, and rewriting logic in its language. 

You see them, you want them, you crave them, and suddenly, red flags turn pastel pink, and gut instincts are drowned out by the rush of emotions. 

We tell ourselves it’s different this time, that love is meant to be all-consuming, that the heart knows what the mind cannot comprehend. But does it? Or are we simply victims of emotional blind spots, unable to see the truth when passion takes the wheel?

Studies show that when we fall in love, our brains flood with dopamine and oxytocin chemicals that create intense pleasure and deep attachment. In this state, the part of the brain responsible for critical thinking, the prefrontal cortex, becomes less active. 

This is why the things that would normally raise an eyebrow; disrespect, inconsistency, even outright dishonesty, suddenly seem excusable. The brain, wired for pleasure and connection, tricks us into believing what we want to be true, rather than what is true.

For instance, my friend met this guy at a party, and their chemistry was undeniable. He was charming, spontaneous, and had this bad-boy energy that made her heart race. Unfortunately, other friends warned her about this guy’s reputation and how his past relationships always ended in chaos. 

But she didn’t see it that way. She thought her friends didn’t understand him. He ghosted her severally, she found reasons to justify it. When he dismissed her feelings, she convinced herself she was overreacting. When he finally broke her heart, she realised the truth; the signs were always there, she just failed to see them as they were.

This is a pattern many fall into. When passion overwhelms reason, we justify red flags, cling to potential instead of reality, and make excuses for behaviour we wouldn’t tolerate from a friend. 

We tell ourselves they’ll change, that love will fix it, that we’re being too harsh. But deep down, we know, love should not require us to abandon our wisdom.

Self-awareness is key. We need to recognise when our emotions are making the decisions instead of our rational mind. We need to slow down, step back, and ask what you would tell your friends if they were the ones in that situation. 

Also, trust patterns, not promises, and listen to actions, not just words. And most importantly, accept that love, in its healthiest form, does not demand blindness, it thrives in clarity.

Because real love feels like working in harmony for couples. Finally, real love means choosing someone with open eyes, not despite the truth, but because of it.

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Have you ever ignored clear red flags in a relationship because emotions took over? What happened, and when did you finally see the truth?

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