Too Many Apologies

Are you not tired of toning down your voice, second-guessing your thoughts, and tiptoeing around the edges of life like you don’t quite belong in the centre of it?

You’ve been doing this for a long time, for no fault of yours, only that someone put you there because they said something they weren’t supposed to say to you, or someone called you too much for being expressive, or because you were ignored just enough times that silence felt safer than speaking. 

Maybe it was when your kindness was mistaken for weakness, or your difference was labelled as difficult. And somehow, over time, you started apologizing, not just for mistakes, but for simply being.

But the truth is, no one is born believing they’re not enough. That narrative is planted through unmet needs, unspoken grief, rejection, comparison, or environments that teach us to measure our value through someone else’s comfort. 

The need to please, to not rock the boat, to dim your spark to be accepted… these are survival tactics, not signs of worth. And the problem is, the more you apologize for existing, the more invisible you feel. That invisibility becomes a mask, and eventually, even you can’t remember who’s underneath.

Take this piece as the turning point your soul has been desiring. It is time to say “No more.” Because why do you treat yourself like you don’t matter? Have you realised it? And are you satisfied with it? 

Can anyone treat you better if you treat yourself anyway and anyhow? You’ve got to overcome this so that others can start treating you better. Stop waiting for permission to matter. Stop apologising for every single thing you do, even when it doesn’t harm or hurt. I mean, you don’t need to justify your feelings, your presence and your dreams for recognition.

Self-worth isn’t found in validation. It’s built in the small choices to show up for yourself. To speak kindly to your reflection. To set boundaries without guilt. To take up space without apologizing. To recognize that your existence isn’t a burden, it’s a gift. One of the hardest things you’ll ever do is unlearn the lie that being humble means being invisible. It’s not. You can be grounded and still glow.

So many people, especially in their twenties and early thirties, are on this journey. Trying to balance societal expectations, family pressure, cultural norms, and personal dreams, all while fighting the invisible weight of inadequacy. But growth begins when you stop outsourcing your worth. When you realize that the right people don’t need you to shrink; they need you to stand tall.

The day you stop apologizing for existing is the day you begin living more fully. It’s not about arrogance. It’s about wholeness. You can own your strengths without dimming them, name your wounds without being defined by them, and walk with dignity even when others don’t understand your pace. That’s what self-worth looks like: not perfection, but presence.

So if you’ve ever felt like you’re always saying sorry for feeling too much, asking for more, or just being you, maybe this is your turning point. Because you don’t always have to owe the world an apology for showing up. You owe yourself a promise to never disappear again. So live life, unapologetically to God’s glory!

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Have you ever caught yourself apologizing for just being who you are? What moment made you realize you needed to stop?

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