Just yesterday after church, I joined the queue at a mobile money shop. A young man in front of me wanted to withdraw a little cash. His account balance was low, and after the transaction, he smiled awkwardly and said to the vendor, “One day, I’ll stop embarrassing myself like this.” The vendor laughed casually and replied, “You’ve always been broke. That’s just who you are.”
As I walked away, I realised that the young man’s countenance had changed and he kept shaking his head and looking into the sky as he ‘disappeared ‘. I kept thinking about those words : “That’s just who you are!” It reminded me of when I couldn’t come through for a business partner like I used to because something went south and she said “My go- to person is broke.” Immediately, I responded, “I’m not broke and I can never be broke. I am only without it for a moment.”
Perhaps the vendor meant no harm. Maybe it was only a joke. But I asked myself how many times the young man had heard similar words from friends, relatives, classmates, or even from himself. These days, the moment someone loses a job, he’s tagged a failure. A young woman experiences a divorce and she concludes that she’s unlovable. Someone suffers a health challenge and begins to see themselves not worthy to be alive anymore.
Psychologists often speak about the power of repeated thoughts. The stories we tell ourselves eventually shape the lives we believe are possible. Our brains naturally search for consistency. Once we accept a label, we begin noticing only the evidence that supports it while ignoring everything that contradicts it.
I have been wondering why we mostly introduce people by their circumstances. We are quick to mention ‘The Poor man’, ‘The disabled woman’, or ‘the prisoner’. Inasmuch as these descriptions are sometimes factually accurate, when repeated often, soon enough, they become cages made of words. We stop seeing the whole person and begin seeing only the condition they carry.
This is why human dignity matters so deeply. I believe dignity should remind us that every human is always larger than the hardest chapter of their lives. Every careless label can become another brick in someone else’s invisible prison. Every thoughtful word of hope can become a key. As I type this, I still regret not having the opportunity to speak some kind and soul reinvigorating words to the young man.
I know that today, we still experience challenges. There are dreams that have taken longer than we expected. There are prayers that remain unanswered. There are seasons that test our patience. However, we must refuse to let any of those seasons rename us. I want to assure you that you are not the delay or the disappointment. I am not the opinion someone formed about me during my weakest moment. In fact, we are not even defined by our greatest mistakes.
One of the greatest ways we protect human dignity is by refusing to reduce ourselves or others to a single season of life. Let’s find comfort in the way God consistently separates people from their circumstances. He speaks to people according to who they could become rather than merely describing where they currently stand.
Have we ever thought of why God called Gideon a mighty man of valour even when he was weak, distressed and hiding in the winepress? It connotes that our situations may explain where we are standing today, but it should never be the authority to tell us who we are. Always remember that until death, every defeat is psychological.
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